so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Randomize