Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
