6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize