everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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