i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I am naked and annoyed.
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