Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

I want to walk on stilts...naked

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(970): I want to walk on stilts...naked http://tfl.nu/tpp3

Replies (14) Good night (1969) Bad night (623)
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(630): View more from Illinois

my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.

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(630): my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out. http://tfl.nu/fs1q

Replies (15) Good night (1392) Bad night (4886)
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(519): View more from Ontario

her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs

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(519): her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs http://tfl.nu/0f09

Replies (20) Good night (11709) Bad night (1563)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two

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(617): I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two http://tfl.nu/3vhn

Replies (6) Good night (3349) Bad night (1520)
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(334): View more from Alabama

He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.

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(334): He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning. http://tfl.nu/odgl

Replies (58) Good night (16826) Bad night (3856)
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(712): View more from Iowa

He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.

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(712): He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him. http://tfl.nu/xqld

Replies (30) Good night (5848) Bad night (2096)
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(850): View more from Florida

I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.

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(850): I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think. http://tfl.nu/r53a

Replies (7) Good night (1286) Bad night (2836)
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(420): View more from

I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.

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(420): I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me. http://tfl.nu/1hem

Replies (5) Good night (3094) Bad night (787)
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(209): View more from California

Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something

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(209): Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something http://tfl.nu/htcf

Replies (23) Good night (1094) Bad night (3484)
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(310): View more from California

Can we just ponder our lives for a second.

(818): View more from California

No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.

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(310): Can we just ponder our lives for a second. (818): No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles. http://tfl.nu/vtnc

Replies (8) Good night (2267) Bad night (983)
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(256): View more from Alabama

I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.

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(256): I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down. http://tfl.nu/18pc

Replies (2) Good night (723) Bad night (378)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes

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(864): I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes http://tfl.nu/i59t

Replies (0) Good night (568) Bad night (345)
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(317): View more from Indiana

Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?

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(317): Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed? http://tfl.nu/ggrn

Replies (13) Good night (416) Bad night (890)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

How high are you?

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(405): All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes. (1-405): How high are you? http://tfl.nu/bptv

Replies (4) Good night (677) Bad night (304)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.

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(307): Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen. http://tfl.nu/bs4y

Replies (0) Good night (713) Bad night (222)

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