ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
