when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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