I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
