How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Found the puke drawer
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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