What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
