i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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