Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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