On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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