can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Randomize
