she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
