a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
It's rum buckets o'clock
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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