they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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