My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
