just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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