i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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