SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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