dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
