Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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