Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
