He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
