I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Randomize