i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
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am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
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Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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