i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
that is very illegal...i love you.
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