whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
