But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
