If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
