This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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