the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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