Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
and you said cock pushups were impossible
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
This baby is an asshole
You have to summon your inner elephant
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
