If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
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that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
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I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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