Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
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How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm just crazy horny about you
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This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again