I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
