just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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