Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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