best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
