Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
