i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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