love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
