she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
