So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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