You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
