Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
