I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize