Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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