You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize