Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
This is my gift to your gina
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
