wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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